NO NURSING HOME FOR ME!!!!


No nursing home for us. We’ll be checking into a Holiday Inn!

With the average cost for nursing home care being $188.00 per day,
there is a better way when we get old and too feeble.
I’ve already checked on reservations at The Holiday Inn.

For a combined long term stay discount and senior discount, it’s $59.23 per night.
That leaves $128.77 a day for lunch and dinner in any restaurant we want,
or room service, laundry, Gratuities and special TV movies.

Plus, they provide a spa, swimming pool, a workout room, a lounge and washer dryer, etc.

Most have free toothpaste and razors, and all have free shampoo and soap.
$5 worth of tips a day you’ll have the entire staff scrambling to help you.

They treat you like a customer, not a patient.

There’s a city bus stop out front, and seniors ride free.

The handicap bus will also pick you up
(if you fake a decent limp).

To meet other nice people, call a church bus on Sundays.

For a change of scenery, take the airport shuttle bus and eat at one of
The nice restaurants there.

While you’re at the airport, fly somewhere.
Otherwise, the cash keeps building up.

It takes months to get into decent nursing homes, Holiday Inn will take your reservation today.

And you’re not stuck in one place forever — you can move from Inn to Inn, or even from city to city.

Want to see Hawaii ? They have Holiday Inn there too.
TV broken? Light bulbs need changing? Need a mattress replaced? No problem..
They fix everything, and apologize for the inconvenience.

The Inn has a night security person and daily room service.
The maid checks to see if you are ok. If not, they’ll call an ambulance . . .
Or the undertaker. If you fall and break a hip, Medicare will pay for the hip,
and Holiday Inn will upgrade you to a suite for the rest of your life.

And no worries about visits from family. They will always be glad to find you,
and probably check in for a few days mini vacation.

The grand-kids can use the pool.

What more could I ask for?

So, when I reach that golden age,
I’ll face it with a grin.

No NURSING HOME FOR ME!!!!

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About J. D. Groover

I truely believe that what should matter most in life is how you see yourself, not how someone else tries to convince you to see yourself. *****Life is not about "finding yourself"*****its about creating yourself.!!!!! I write and post things here because I like to think I am contributing some things of value to my world. Some times a little humor, some times things with a more serious tone, but hopefully always in good taste. If what I post occasionally bites a politician in the ass, all the better :>)
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